The Journey to Diagnosis

A few years back, in April, a friend asked how we had gotten my son diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder.  I told her that I would share that journey one day.  Truly I had hoped to do it before now; however, with the life being so hectic, I just didn't know how to write it.  We'll see how I do with it now.  And I'm guessing that this will be a multiple part blog.....so here's attempt number one...

Gabriel was an easy baby.  He was induced with pitosin and evicted naturally out of the womb with IV drugs only.  He was jaundice, so much so that I think any other pediatrician would have put him in a blanket contraption.  But Gabe truly was an easy baby.  He smiled easily, laughed often and was easily contented.  His lullaby put him to sleep almost every night with ease.  I bragged about him eating almost everything, nursing like a champ and sleeping wonderfully!  Going through the stages, I really don't remember any major problems with physical development, motor issues, but speech was another issue.

As a mom who is fluent in sign language, I exposed him early to signs.  Typically, by six months normally developing children start signing.  Well, Gabe didn't follow the typically developing child in this area.  I thought to myself, huh, that's odd - but didn't really think a lot about it because I didn't know if I was doing ENOUGH to have him start signing back to me.  After turning one and starting to babel a little, I got excited and tried to get him to communicate and get those verbal skills working!

Here's where my problems started.  Notice I say, "my." I started noticing that Gabe was almost delayed in his speech and language production.  With me teaching the Deaf & Hard of Hearing, I'm around speech pathologists all the time and am friends with quite a few of them.  So, each one I knew, I asked what the deal is.  And I got the same response, "Melissa, he is a boy, and he's within the normal range.  Quit worrying!  He's fine!"  Love them all, because it made me feel good, and they were right - he was within the normal range and being a boy, he could have been later on the normal range than what he was.  Trusting my friends and intelligent colleagues, I quit worrying.

Then it was the next school year and my kid was just plain weird!  I remember sitting in a speech clinicians office at school and crying during one of our lunch gatherings, because my kid was developing wonderfully, but he was weird.  I explained to my friend that my Gabriel at almost three years old was talking in paragraphs.  When he did something, he held out until he really knew how to do it and then went full force.  He didn't stay at the one and two word utterances like he was supposed to - he went to sentences and then jumped into paragraphs.  I told them the story about how my aunt and uncle were watching Gabe, and he asked, "Where are my parents?"  Not, "where's mommy and daddy," not "where's my momma," not an easy child-like thing to say - oh, no, it's skips right to the college educated kid, "where are my parents?" So this time, my speech friend kind of giggled and laughed.  I was worried because my child who has college educated parents is speaking above the level of other children his age.  That's ludicrous!  Why would someone worry about that? Well, because I'm kinda a worrier, lol. So, my loving friend encouraged me to question my doctor about it since I am so worried......

Funny enough, it worked out that Gabe had some minor sickness and was in to our family's MD in the next few weeks.  His dad took him in, and I urged him to inform the doctor about his speech patterns and level of expressive vocabulary, his skipping around in speech development.  I plagued Gabe's dad to death about how worried I was over this miniscule thing.  And, with full confidence that this would be addressed, they went into the doctor's office.  The family MD is a wonderful guy and was nagged at by Gabe's dad about Gabe's language development; listing off everything on my list, however, the doctor saw no indication for concern.  In fact, Gabriel was complimented for aforementioned language development, due to his statement of, "Can I have a lollipop, please, Dr. INSERT NAME HERE"  By this point, I was done being concerned....all of my speech friends had been supportive and encouraging me that there were no problems, and now the doctor agrees there are no problems.

This is where I will stop on this post and say, "To be continued........."

Sensory Overload Desiring Normal

This month is a time to be aware of Autism.  Autism comes in many shapes, sizes and forms.  Autism is a spectrum disorder that affects each and everyone differently.  Some people can be mildly affected to where it can be seen as a gift; others are more severely affected.

For us at our house, we are mildly affected. The most difficult thing for me sometimes is the sensory issues we have. My loving seven year old, Gabe, has some issues with sensory needs. He craves sensory input to even himself out. So this morning at 7:00 AM, he was wrapped up like a burrito! Or a crepe whichever he prefers at the time. My youngest, Graham, wants to be just like brother. So here are my little burritos watching TV.

 Gabe enjoying some morning cartoons, being disrupted by mom!

My little crepes!  Graham and Gabe spending some brotherly bonding time with the television.

Gabe and his Adventures in Life

Recently, My big G went to a Taekwondo tournament.  I am always amazed and impressed to see him compete.  Although he participates with fewer competitors than the average kid, he still earns what he does.  This being his second tournament, he received two second place medals and is ecstatic to tell you all about them. 

Let me remind you, I'm talking about Gabe.  He's my little man with Autism.  As I have mentioned him to you in a post, The Face of Autism, I wanted to share with you a little bit more about our family's journey with Autism.  Gabe is very high functioning and does quite well for himself, but I am always looking for activities for him to participate in which will benefit him.  As our Autism consultant from the schools and the occupational therapist had recommended, I had considered looking into him joining Taekwondo (tkd).  I was extremely hesitant to do so, because I am such a passive person.  I have been raised to follow my heart and not act with my hands.  So, against my beliefs, I looked into it and wasn't impressed. 

Not two months later, at our county fair, I literally run into a person from the local tkd school.  This family is one that our autism consultant had recommended me to talk with because our sons were so similar.  Their son being 17 and Gabe being 7, I should meet with them and get to know how their son is at 17 because most likely, my son will be similar at that age.  They did not know me, and I did not know how much of an impact they would have on my life!  As this fair was in the summer, I had Gabe signed up right as school was starting.  After meeting them and briefly talking to them I had made the decision that this was the avenue to go. Little did I know what a life changing experience it would be for Gabe.

The rest of his summer was filled with sweet anticipation of what was to come and a lot of watching Kung Fu Panda.  He kept telling me as we would talk about tkd that he wanted to learn Kung Fu!  I tried to steer him in the right direction but not knowing much, I couldn't.  That first week of two classes after school was an absolute disaster for me.  I would get him there, and he was tired and so silly.  He laughed at all the wrong jokes, he was so tired out he didn't want to move correctly.  He looked like a giggly noodle!  Seven months later, what has changed?  He has some muscle tone.  Yes, he is still low tone, but most children with autism are.  He can do a few sit ups and he can make me giggle by attempting a push up.  He has the motor control to move his hands and legs together to do a jumping jack.  He has coordination.  Oh, let me rephrase that, he has some coordination, an improvement, but leaving a lot to be desired still!  ;) 

Which brings us to our most recent events.  After many private lessons, classes, and work at home, Gabe went to a competition and, although, did not perform as well as he could have, he did his best.  He does much better, of course, when he is in a private lesson where there is little distraction.  But in a room with hundreds of people and multiple competitions happening, my amazing Gabe took two second places.  This is one proud mama!






A picture from Gabe's first tournament with his best friend and instructor.  I really wouldn't know what to do without our tkd family. 

The Face of Autism

This is the face of autism.  The off stare, the simulated smile, the disinterested look.  This is a face of Gabe.

I have thought of the two pictures here on this post many, many times. . . My oldest son Gabriel has been blessed with Autism.  Some of the doctors have said Aspergers, some have said, PDD-NOS.  Either way, it doesn't really matter.  What matters is that I love this child for everything that he is.  I see the parts of his autism and I see the parts of him that are without autism.  In my family, I try to view this as a blessing.  I frequently remind myself that without this disability, my son would not be who he is and there would be some other annoying thing that he does just the same as some of his autistic tendencies do. . . it's not the autism, it's life. 

We truly are blessed, because his case is very mild.  He talks, walks, interacts, is social, accepts physical touch happily, and is extremely smart.  There are many parents out there that have children with autism and cannot use the same words to describe their children.  We are blessed.  I cannot count how many times a day he makes me laugh by quoting some random phrase from a movie, commercial, TV show, radio moment, etc.  He is so passionate and imaginative, so creative and loving, so intelligent and silly.  He is also socially awkward, physically awkward, and a mess in the sensory area.  Each and every moment may bring a response that is expectable or a response you wonder what planet it came from, good or bad! 

I cannot begin to tell you how thankful I am for him.  Gabe is not only a son of mine, but also a teacher.  Everyday, I learn about him, and autism.  I can't fathom who I would be without all the knowledge I've gained by him having autism.  He is constantly challenging me to grow as a mom. 

People may look at Gabe sometimes and see the face of autism.  Underneath the autism, when he shines through and moves aside the disinterest, this is what I see. . . This is the silly face of Gabe, that so many people get to see so often.